Farewell DQ!

20th May 2011.this is my last day in Darul Quran JAKIM as a student of Program Persijilan Tahfiz DQ/UIAM for 2010/2011 session. Usually, when students will finish their study at a place soon,we know that is a 'very-cannot-wait' moment for them, as they will have a new side of life when they're out of the school. Which means that, they are 'out' from discipline rules, 'out' from the hostel rules, and etc. (maybe this happen just for 'unmatured' student, perhaps =.=)


But, it's a different thing i feel right now. I feel that i really want to shout with my whole energy now "I don't want checkout from this place!!!!!" T___T
This place...had gives me 1001 sweet memories and unforgettable moments in every second when i studied there. The lake, the Mosque, the kuliyyah room, the hostel, the meeting room, the hostel field, the tasmik classes, the friends..........


I stil remember when the first time i reached there, my heart asked myself, "cha, is this a really good decision should you take for your future?"now, i understand that this is a kind of question of one who know nothing yet about this barakah place. That's me, once upon a time..
When the SPM result was released, and most of my friends decided to further their studies overseas, my heart asked me again, "cha, did'nt you feel regret for not taking any scholarship to further your study oversea like them?"that time, i choose to stay in DQ.


In that time, i admit that i did'nt know and understand why i choose that decision. It is easy to say, that i just follow the takdir. Nothing more to be asked.


But now,i know the best answer for it.


One thing for sure, what the strongest thing that made me to choose the decison is...
the UKHUWWAH in DQ.The bond is really incredible for me. And, i know, for my friends too.
Just the people who experienced it, will understand. The Ukhuwwah bond which appears in this journey with Al-quran. SubhanAllah.


This, make me reflect something. If this ukhuwwah, which are made between just the ordinary people like us, had made a very 'incredible',amazing, and flourishing moments in our heart, how about, the ukhuwwah between the Sahabah and The Prophet Muhammad S.A.W? The ukhuwwah strengthen by the last Revelation Words from The Highest God, Allah s.w.t? SubhanAllah, i can't imagine how they feel.
Alhamdulillah..thanks to Allah because He had gives me the opportunity to feel this sweetest feeling. I love Allah. Ya Allah, please forgive me for all the sins i'd done.T__T
Please strengthen my heart to keep mujahadah in tadabbur and memorizing Your aayah..
Please keep our ukhuwwah bond till jannah, Ya Allah..
aamin..

The DQ Mosque. One of the most beautiful mosque i ever seen. 0.o

My Piece of Hopes

Bismillahhhirrahmannirrahim.

Alhamdulillah. Last night, I arrived at Seremban at about a quarter past eleven and the train station, of course was quite placid. Thanks to Allah because my very reliable friend, Azlina disposed to escort me. It was an emergency. I had to go back home because my father will have a medical operation this week. So, I must have a run into him first before he enters the surgery ward. Please pray for my father.



When I reached home, as usual the first thing I will do is 'spring-cleaning' my room. Of course, when we out of home and our room have a big possibility to be entered by the 'small monstersss' (actually my small brothers =.=' ), don't be so optimist that your room will be in the same and in a good condition as it does when you leave it. And here, I want to shortcut the cleaning scene. When I rearranged my old books and my old paraphernalia of my school epoch, by chance I found my 'Blue Diary'; the WITNESS of all my destitutions in through my life in the school. T__T



And when I recited the book, I realise that all this while, I am a kind of person that love to jot down whatever that was up-to-the-minute around me and whatever I was thinking about in the book. Then, I paused at a page of 'my feeling' and got traumatized when I read this:



"Bismillahhirrahmannirrahim.
'' Ya Allah, Kau kuatkanlah hatiku dalam menempuh ujian ini.."

Doa ini sering aku lafazkan di dalam solat ku setiap hari. Sekarang aku merasakan hanya Allah sebaik-baik tempat aku mengadu. Bukan senang hendak menghadapi semua perkara ini berseorangan. Bukan mudah untuk aku melupakan segalanya. Setiap hari, air mataku pasti berlinang mengenang segala dosa dan kesilapan yang telah aku lakukan.



Ya Rabbi..kadangkala aku merasa langsung tiada daya untuk mengharungi semua ini. Aku merasa hamper putus asa.Tetapi, aku tahu..dan aku cuba mengerti, bahawa segala yang berlaku ini adalah tanda kasih sayangmu kepadaku, ya Allah.. aku percaya, selepas kesusahan pasti akan datang kesenangan. Inna ma'al 'usriyusra. Aku yakin dengan janjiMuya Allah..

AKU YAKIN ya Allah..laranyahatikuini..



Beri kekuatan padaku yaRahman. Aku tidak mahu menitiskan air mata di hadapan sahabat-sahabatku ya Allah. Tunjukkan aku jalan yang lurus..aku amat bersyukur padaMu kerana Engkau masih mengkehendaki aku untuk mengingatiMu ya Allah..



Kau himpunkanlah segala duka bagiku di dunia, supaya aku dapat tersenyum di padang Mahsyar kelak….

'Ya Rabbi, sudilah pandang kami..terangi jalan gelap ini..jangan biarkan aku terus sendiri..mencari, mendaki dan berduri..Ya Rabbi, dengarlah doaku ya Rabbi..hadirlah dalam kehidupan kematian kami..cubaan, ujiankulalui..YaAllahmYaRahmanYa Rahim…'



Pulihkan semangatkuYa Allah.Bimbinglah aku.Aku ingin berada di jalanMu. Ihdinassirotolmustaqim. Terbitkanlah sifat ikhlas dalam hatiku dalam melakukan apa sahaja pekerjaan Ya Allah. Semuanya adalah berpaksikan niatku keranaMu ya Allah.



Jauhkanlah fikiranku dari berfikir bahawa aku sedang keseorangan. Aku mesti dan wajib yakin yang Engkau selalu bersamaku Ya Allah. Pandangan manusia terhadap diriku tidak penting. Biarlah mereka menganggap apa sahaja yang mereka suka. Apa yang paling penting dalam seluruh hidupku, adalah pandangan Mu yaRahman.."



14 April 2009. Musolla.



End of page.


When I read this, I remember all the sufferings and distress i was fronting on that time. T__T

That is my piece of hopes when I was learning in the school. When so many scrapes came, and my friends impugned me, I feel alone in that jiffy. It was just one thing that I can do in that phase. JUST PRAY TO ALLAH.



To all my old school chums, thanks a lot, because you all had taught me what the true meaning of this life existence is.



Love you all. Because of Allah.


 

Your face is in my mind.

I just dont know what to say. One thing for sure, i miss all of my friends. My ex schoolmates. My ex DQmates. May Allah always protects you all. Love you all fillah. No times to create a long words. Still in DQ. InsyaAllah, on 28th of this January, i will khatam my hafazan. Alhamdulillah. I plead you all to pray for me in  always keep my mujahadah in this journey.

i miss my old friendss..

everytime when i look at my pencil box, my books, my papers, my shoes, and every single thing of my ex-school stuff, i just know there is one feeling in my heart..i miss them..my ex classmates, teachers, ustaz, ustazah, and everyone..in my ex school...

i love all of them..
i miss them..
nothing can grab the memories we had together..
sometime, i will cry alone when i saw their picture..

i hope..
really hope..
may ALLAH always protects them everywhere they are, whatever they are doing, and with whoever they are..

to all my fellow friends..
i love you all...
thanks for everything..
may our ukhuwwah remains forever..